Superstars 3

"Last time on Total Drama: Superstar Showdown, the contestants took part in their first challenge! Julia got mad at Arthur and Kavren, not surprisingly, and Nic continued to try to act cool and evil around the girls. Tolky acted pretty awkward around me, hehe, as I explained the challenge, which was to build forts out of whatever materials they could find in the woods and then play extreme capture the flag. The Swagged Out Citrus Fruits had trouble with some of their members, who weren't exactly being that helpful, while the Hopalong Ralphcakes destroyed them and won the challenge, thanks to the grumpy Wolfgang, and Kavren, who was just as weird as usual. After he destroyed the tents, Ori was the target of the first elimination of the season, and Layla got to stay another night. Who will win? Who will lose? Find out today, on Total... Drama... Superstar Showdown!"

The Swagged Out Citrus Fruits are shown lying down in their sleeping bags on the ground, because of the tents not being able to be used. Tolkien is snoring loudly, and in his sleep, he moves close to Trick, placing his head on Trick's shoulder.

Trick suddenly wakes up. "Uh, dude?" he whispers. Tolkien doesn't budge. Trick flicks Tolkien's head, and he still doesn't make a peep. Trick grabs a stick, and whacks Tolkien in the head, and he finally wakes up.

"Uh? Whaaaaa? Hey, Trick, is that you?" Tolkien says groggily, showing that he has gigantic bags under his eyes. "I had nightmares last night, dude."

"Nightmares? Dude, you have some crazy dreams. I saw you in Tokyo... Yeah, maybe you should cut down on the dreaming," says Trick calmly.

"What? Cut down on the... Hey, that's impossible! Trick, you need to brush up on your education. I dream every single night, and they're all about Roz, and how I like her..." Tolkien stares at Trick. "Oops. Shouldn't have said that."

"Dude, it's obvious that you like her. She likes you, too. You just gotta play it cool, man. That's how I got Cammy to like me," says Trick. "You'll be fine, man."

"Meh. Thanks for the kind words," says Tolkien sarcastically. "I know nothing about being cool. Dude, I play a fantasy role-playing game. That's not 'cool'."

Devin walks out of his tent, stark naked. Tolkien and Trick stare at him, and after a long pause, he says, "Uh, jus' goin' out fo' a li'l swim, yo."

PJ wakes up, sees the naked Devin, then goes back to sleep. Instead of snoring, she says "..." over and over.

After Devin has jumped in the lake, everyone else on the team wakes up, except for Alex, who is still sleeping heavily.

"Ugh, I keep getting texts from Arthur that says he's 'butthurt', he's probably just trolling me. Butthurt? Maybe I'll stab him in the butt, and that will make him butthurt," Julia says.

"Girl, don't even listen to Arthur, mostly everything that comes out of his mouth is crap," says Chrissy.

"Um, I think I've figured that out, after like 16 years of hanging out with him," Julia says. "I hate that morbidly obeeeese moron. Hey, did you hear that 1E's new album title was released? OMFG, I'm so flipping excited, eeeeeeee!

"Hooray," says Helga dryly. "What's it called, 'Up All Morning'? Those dudes pick out the worst names ever for their songs and albums. What's the 'One Thing' anyway? I bet it's boobs, all guys like those, sadly. Ugh, what Neanderthals."

"Mhm. I'm convinced Julian liked me just for my boobs," says Estrella. "I overheard him saying naughty things to Tolkien once." Tolkien giggles quietly to himself.

Layla walks out of her tent, with her hair wild and her makeup looking blotchy and ugly. "Ugh, hello, everyone. Got no sleep last night, because nobody massaged me. You guys really need to work on that... Hmph."

"You know, maybe if you were nice to people, they would be your butler," says Alex, just waking up.

"Nice? Whoever heard of such a thing? If you want to get far in a game like this, you can't be nice," says Layla. "I thought you would know that."

"Muh," states Alex. He yawns, stretches out his arms, and falls asleep again. "Wow, some team," mutters Helga. Estrella nods her head in agreement.

The scene changes to the Hopalong Ralphcakes' cabin, where they are all luxuriously relaxing. Arthur and Kavren are in the corner of the room, playing jacks.

"...Onesies," says Arthur in an extremely bored tone. "This is not fun."

"Twosies," says Kavren as he throws a ball at the jacks and they scatter. "You know, Art, why are we doing this when we have a hot tub, a snack bar, and a plasma TV?"

"I honestly have no idea," Arthur states. "It's just fun for some reason. Let's talk about women, and how attractive they are. Personally, I think Chelsey is pretty attractive-looking, and Elena would be if she was not a Barbie. Also, I have to admit, Julia is not terrible either."

"Julia? But I thought you hated her," says Kavren. After contemplating for a moment, he says, "Heeey, do you just get her mad because you have a crush on her? You're one of those dudes?"

"Yes," says Arthur frankly. "Oh, and I also like being an annoying little piece of crap, so that is a big factor."

"Whoa, I didn't know you would admit it so easily," says Kavren happily. "What do you think about Abbey, d00d?"

"She's got some very nice tits," Arthur states. "You know, I'm just being honest."

"Okay, our conversation is over," says Kavren. "Wanna play some New Supah Jario Bros. Wuu and not socialize whatsoever while doing so?" Arthur nods, and the two run upstairs.

Chelsey, Elena, and Nic are shown watching Nebraska Shore on the plasma TV. "You know, this is my favorite episode of the new season, they're really improving. I loooove Snooki," Chelsey gushes. "Wait, Nic, why are you here?"

"Yeah, you tool, go away," Elena snorts. "Nebraska Shore is a chicks' show. I don't even like Chelsey, but this show brings us together."

"Vas happenin', ladies?" Nic says flirtatiously. "Don't mind me, I'm just hanging out here, and I just happen to be on your couch. I am not even paying attention to the show."

Elena obnoxiously flips her long and flowing hair around, and purposely hits Nic in the face with it. "Ugh, whatever, I'm getting out of here," she groans. "Just watch, they're gonna cancel the show anyway." She stomps away from the couch, and pushes Trey away, who happens to just barely be in her way. "MOVE!"

"You're so mean to me... Why do you have to be so controlling, can't I think for myself..." Trey whispers.

Puck is shown, sitting down on the couch and playing video games. "Whoo-hoo, high score and a level up! Man, this video game is coooooooool," he cheers.

"I AM BEHIND YOU!" yells a loud and menacing voice. Puck shrieks loudly, turns around, and sees nothing. He then starts to shiver, and pees his pants.

Flora, MacKenzie, and Veronica are shown in the basement, which is small and filled with a bunch of mounted animal heads. "All right!" says Veronica. "Today is the first meeting of CAB, also known as Chicks Against Boringness. Now, what should we talk about first?"

"Who to vote out?" Flora suggests. "There are lots of people I would nominate."

"All right, I say Chelsey. She's way too popular, and before we know, she's gonna start voting us out," says Veronica. "

"Chelsey? Yeah, she was kind of mean to me and Cammy back in TDRev..." says MacKenzie. "Elena is worse, though. We should go for her first."

"Yeah, Elena is extremely mean and stuff. I don't think anyone likes her, why is she even in this season?" Flora says. "We're voting her."

There is a large crashing sound, and then someone is heard screaming. Flora, MacKenzie, and Veronica run upstairs to see what has happened, and sure enough, every contestant is there, along with Roz.

"Asdfghjkl," yells Roz. "What the crap? I was sitting here, texting my boyfraaaaaaan, and suddenly, some weird shadowy person came out of nowhere and stole my phone? Then, I looked out the window, and saw him/her/whatever get onto this giant horse and gallop away into the little tourist-y town over there!"

"Lolwut?" says Kavren after a long pause.

"Oh, hehe, you know... That's you guys' challenge today. You gotta go into the little tourist-y town over there and find my phone. This totally isn't an excuse for letting you guys have more interactions and less action because the author hates action scenes. Not at all..." Roz says. "So, yeah, split up into your teams, and whoever finds the phone first wins invincibility!"

"Wait, I'm more curious about your boyfriend. Didn't you break up with Chaz?" Tolkien says awkwardly.

"Hehe, Tolky, you're funny," says Roz. "Just go with yo' team, boy-eeeee."

The Hopalong Ralphcakes are shown outside, walking to the city. "Now would be an excellent time to revive the marching song from Tiki Jungle," states Arthur. "Yo, Father Christmas, are you coming or not?"

Trey is sitting down on the ground, playing with a dandelion and looking depressed. "Dude, stop calling me that... But yeah, I don't feel like walking..."

"Trey, you moron, if you don't get up, we'll vote you out," Elena says angrily. "Come on, you're holding our team back. How are we supposed to get to this darn city anyway? It's like a hundred miles away."

"What if we hijack a car from an innocent bystander and then steal some money from a bank?" suggests Wolfgang, as he gets some disturbed stares. "What, I was just thinking out loud."

"Excellent idea, Wolfie! There's a car right there, actually," says Puck. "Let's jump in!"

Puck, Wolfgang, and the boys begin to climb into the car. "Uh, where do we sit?" Chelsey says. "Us chicks need some room, dudes. This car can't be a total sausage-fest. Girls don't like that."

"Get in the trunk," says Wolfgang gruffly. The girls quickly jump into the trunk, and they all drive to the city. Once they finally get there, the Swagged Out Citrus Fruits are already there.

"What? How?!" Nic asks in shock. "I thought we had left before you all!"

"Uh, no, G," says Devin. "We got dem jetpacks, yo. C'mon, teamies, leggo." Devin and the rest of his team strut away.

Once they're all gone, Arthur says, "All right. Me, Kavren, and Chelsey will go together, Wolfgang and Puck can go, and--"

"Ew, why me? I prefer going by myself. Say one of my friends is here and sees me hanging out with you nerds... My life would be over. O-V-E-R. Over," scoffs Chelsey. "I'd even rather go with... Elena." She shudders.

"Fine, girlie, if you wanna go with me, then let's go," Elena says rudely. "We can go check out the Luv Purple store over there."

"Um, I think the boys are already on that..." Veronica says, pointing to Arthur, Kavren, and Puck, who are sprinting over to the store.

"Open the door! Open the door!" Puck squeals, as Arthur attempts to open the door to the Victoria's Secret store. They finally burst in, and see that the store is filled with... old, hairy men.

"Whaaa?" Kavren gasps. "But I thought there were gonna be young, attractive women here! Uh, not that I care. Abbey is enough for me."

"Haw, haw," guffaws one of the old men. "This isn't Victoria's Secret. This is Victor's Secret. It's an adult diaper store. We frequently get these li'l kids in here, thinking that they're gonna find ladies. Buuuut, no ladies have ever come here, except for the workers. You need some diapers?"

"Yes," says Arthur. "I actually do. My peanuts are so loose that I believe they will be falling out at some point."

The old, hairy guy tosses a gigantic diaper over to Arthur, and it hits him in the face. As Arthur brushes it off, a phone mysteriously falls out from the diaper.

"Holy bladvass, it's Roz's phone!" says Kavren, examining the phone. "Wait, uh, never mind. Unless Roz's name is 'Gertrude Flabberman' and she is interested in dentures, it's not hers. Darn it, I thought we were close."

"Let's scoot, men," Arthur says. "This store is not going to help us at all. Maybe we can go get some fast food, huh? My stummick is famished."

"Men? My mom says I'm not a man," says Puck. "Apparently my level of 'social maturity' isn't high enough. Wonder what she means?" The three boys run out of the store, and bump into Tolkien, Trick, Devin, and Alex, who are running towards the store.

"Hey!" they all yell simultaneously. "Why did you... Why are we... Stop talking at the same time as me!"

"We was jus' tryin' t' find Roz's phoney-phone in dat store, yo," Devin explains. "Aaaaan', I also be likin' th' women's undergarments, soooo, it be a prime place t' look."

"No, it's actually a men's diapers store," says Alex coolly. "An' how do you be knowin' dat?" Devin says. "My dad shops there all the time," Alex says. "Come on, boys."

Meanwhile, the girls of the Swagged Out Citrus Fruits are walking down the street, searching in every nook and cranny for the missing cell phone.

"Hmmm," Julia is examining the various muscular boys walking by in beach tees. "I say a seven, six, seven, eight, oooh, that guy's a nine. Seven, six, four, two, eight, nine, six, one, ugly. Where are the 10's?!"

"Well, to be honest, you do set some high standards," grunts Helga. "If I remember correctly, earlier you said that you wouldn't ever date a boy unless he looked like one of the five members of One Erection, and the only guys I've seen who even look close to any of the guys are Kavren and Nic, both of whom you have expressed disgust towards."

"Yeah, Julia, I don't think boys like girls who are fangirls of stuff," Chrissy says coolly. "I mean, you just gotta act chill." Chrissy accidentally bumps into some guy who's walking past, pulls out a pocketknife, and yells, "WATCH IT, BUDDY!" The guy screams and runs away.

"Oh, wow, Helga," Estrella gasps, pointing out a store that says 'Snidely's Books'. "Let's go in there and completely forget about the challenge. I'm sure there are tons of morbid books in there about death and whatnot. Like, the new book in the Vulture Chronicles came out yesterday. In this one, Vincenzo gets stabbed and killed by Raul, who is avenging his dead brother. Tasty."

"...This is why I like you, Estrella," responds Helga, and the two sprint away.

"..." says PJ, pointing to a phone lying on a trash can. "Could it be?" Layla gasps, and starts looking through the phone. "Ugh, it won't turn on!"

"Maybe it's because you're not pressing the button, your finger is just over it..." explains Chrissy. "Are you seriously that pathetic?"

"Shut up, I'm not pathetic!" snorts Layla. "Can someone turn this on for me?" Chrissy snatches the phone from Layla angrily, and mashes the power button over and over. The phone soon blows up, leaving debris everywhere.

"If that actually was Roz's phone, we're completely screwed," Julia worries. "Not as screwed as if 1E split up, though. I don't even wanna think about that..." A single tear falls down Julia's cheek.

Wolfgang, Puck, Arthur, Trey, Kavren, and Nic are shown at a seafood restaurant, and they are -- sure enough -- ordering food.

"Oooh, it's a sexy waitress," says Puck happily. "Coooooool. All righty, lemme order." He walks over to the waitress, who has her back turned to him. "Hey, do you have fish and chips here?"

The waitress looks at Puck like he is an idiot. "What?"

"I said..." says Puck extremely slowly, trying to get her to understand. "Do... you... have... any... fish... and... chips?"

"Dude, I heard you," whines the waitress, in a deep voice. "I said 'what' because obviously, we don't have fish and chips. Do we look like that kind of restaurant? No. We sell stuff like lobsters. For only $199."

"There is NO WAY we're paying that!" Wolfgang yells. "I have absolutely no money, and even if I did, I wouldn't spend it on some crappy seafood. Seafood is disgusting. Come on, guys. We actually need to work."

"No... I wanna eat..." sighs Trey. "I lived off of coconuts at Tiki Island... Time to have some real food for a change..."

"Wait, but none of us have money," Kavren realizes. "I'm really starving, though. I could eat a dead horse."

"Uh, I don't think that is how the saying goes..." says Nic. "But dudes, I'm loaded with benjamins. Girls tip me for being sexy. Yes, it happens. Shall we eat?"

"Dudes, if you don't eat in the next five minutes, we'll kick you out," groans the waitress, raising her voice. She then turns around, and reveals that "she" is actually Smoothie Guy.

"Oh mai..." Kavren says, his mouth hanging open. "Dude, I forgot about your long, flowing blonde locks! That's so nasty!"

"Yeah, you idiots. I spent the last five months sailing the seas in the S.S. Crappyboatthatbreakseasily, but it got boring and I got lost at sea, so after two freakin' weeks, I decided to come here. Of course, you had to show up," says the smoothie guy, narrowing his eyes at Kavren.

"Two weeks... That's better than a year..." Trey says quietly.

"Hey, jolly old elf, all you do is mope and complain about being stuck on the island," Arthur says wisely. "Please still your tongue, or we'll vote you--" Arthur's watch beeps, and he looks at the time, which is 6:30.

"Ohhhhh, no..." mutters everyone, including Smoothie Guy. Everyone looks at Smoothie Guy, and he says, "What? I read the pre-season biographies."

"Wait, guys, maybe the phone is hidden in one of the meals!" says Flora. "Yay, I'm actually being helpful!"

"Um, no, you're not. That's the stupidest idea ever. Definitely not gonna work," scoffs Elena.

"Well, it's worth a try," responds Chelsey. "Come on, Elena. Don't be so moody. People don't like that, it is NOT popular at all."

"...Wait. When did you guys get here?" Kavren says. "Five minutes ago, it was all us dudes. I mean, not that I'm complaining, but you know... Did you have any luck?"

"Yeah, of course we had luck," says Chelsey sarcastically. "No, of course not. If we did, why would we be here? We'd be livin' it up in the big, cool house. Now, let's eat so we can get out of here and actually do the challenge."

"While developing and going through puberty, some children have better luck than others. They--" Before Arthur can finish, Elena takes out a roll of duct tape and angrily tapes it onto his mouth. "Mmrmpht."

A half hour later, the food finally arrives. Smoothie Guy comes out from the kitchen, wheeling in a gigantic table with a dead shark on it, covered in seasoning. "Well, what are you waiting for? EAT."

"What is THAT?" Elena groans. "There is no way. Ew."

Meanwhile, every member of the Swagged Out Citrus Fruits except Helga and Estrella is in a gigantic department store, haplessly looking for the missing phone.

"Dude, what be lingerie, yo?" Devin says, pronouncing it like "ling-er-ee". "I'mma try some on. Look like it be in the happ'nin' fo' style righ' now, G."

"Uh, dude, I wouldn't do that if I were you..." Alex says, while examining various phone cases. "I wonder if some sneaky bastard hid one of the phones in one of these phone cases." After he has no luck looking, he says, "Come on, Dev, let's go, this is boring."

The two walk out of the department store, and into the art gallery-ish place across the street, where Helga and Estrella are shown with gigantic piles of books, Helga with old British literature and Estrella with morbid, gothic fiction. "No luck," grunts Estrella.

"Wait, have you even been looking?" snaps Layla. "Ugh, you guys need to stop being so lazy."

"..." says PJ.

"That's PJ-ese for 'you're one to talk', I'm guessing," says Helga rudely. "Come on, guys. We've been searching for like a day. It's not possible that we're gonna find her phone, we have less than an hour until all the stores close."

"Wait, look out the window!" yells Tolkien. He points to some guy who is outside, texting on a pink phone with a Batman logo on it. "LET'S GO!" Tolkien jumps out of the window, and is followed by every single member of the team, and they all crowd around the man.

"Hey, who are you, and why did you steal Roz's phone?!" yells Julia. "We had to go on a freaking wild goose chase around the city so we could find you!"

"Calm down, who are you guys anyway?" says the guy. "This is my phone. Please leave..." He begins to sweat, and then runs away.

"Well, if that was Roz's phone, that guy is a pretty convincing liar," says Chrissy. "Come on, everyone. Let's just go, I've had enough of this. Who cares if we lose?"

"Muh. Words of wisdom right there, sweetie," mutters Alex. "If I get eliminated, who cares? I'll just have more time to sleep."

Trick takes out his skateboard, and gets on. "I'm headin' back. Let's go, fellas."

Tolkien says in the confessional, "Ugh, that was such a fiasco. I wanted to impress Roz and get her phone, so she could learn that I'm actually a cool and fun person. All she thinks about is Chaz, even though she said she dumped him and likes me... Whatever. Tonight, I'm going to prove to her that I like her."

The Hopalong Ralphcakes are still at the restaurant. There is a gigantic pile of bones where the shark originally was, and most of the contestants looks woozy or tired, some with balloon bellies.

"I think my peanuts are going to pop..." says Arthur groggily. "Was there any phone hidden in the shark? No, there was not. Complete waste of time. Kav, do you still have Gertrude's phone?"

"Mmmm-hmm, I do!" says Kavren happily. "I kept it in case we needed it somehow."

"INB4 the phone is actually Roz's phone and she played some idiotic trick on us," Wolfgang grunts. "Come on, that's just too obvious."

"You know, I wanna get up and leave this place, but I can barely move... Why did I have to eat that shark!" Puck begins to sob.

There is a loud noise that sounds like the noise from earlier when Roz's phone was stolen. Roz appears in the air, wearing a jetpack, and rockets down from the ceiling.

"Haiii, guyzies!" she says happily. "Did you find my phone? It got hacked by some weird dentist company, and it changed everything to a buncha dentures ads and made my name 'Gertrude' something-or-other."

"YES!" yells Wolfgang. "Ugh, I mean... What a coincidence. Here's your phone, Roz." He snatches the phone from Kavren and thrusts it into Roz's hands forcefully.

"OMG, OMG, OMG, this is it!" yells Roz gleefully. "OMG, guys, I'm so, like, happy and blargh. OMG, so yeah, you guys totally win the challenge! Time to text my love buddies! OMG! Eeeee!"

"The next time you say 'OMG', I'm going to get diabetes," grunts Wolfgang.

"Wolfie, be happy! We just won the challenge, dude! What if we become the next Over Nine Thousand?" Puck says happily. "Come on, we can hang out more in the awesome cabin!" Chelsey says in the confessional, "Well, I suppose my team did a decent job today. We won again, which is good for Elena, because her sorry butt is being saved from elimination... Again. Ugh, that girl really pisses me off, and I want to boot her out, but if we keep winning, how is she supposed to leave? Maybe I'll play the Scott and throw a challenge or two. I could easily get Kavren and Puck with me, they're not the brightest bulbs, and if I flirt with Nic, he will join me, too. Arthur and Trey are swing votes, pretty unpredictable, and I think I'll just leave Wolfgang alone. The boring girls seem to not like Elena, either, so maybe I'll make some sort of alliance with them. Puurrrrfect."

The Swagged Out Citrus Fruits are shown walking away from the city, spread out into different groups. Helga and Estrella are pulling a gigantic wagon filled with books.

"Urgh, why... is... this... so... heavy?!" yells Estrella. "I wanna get home and read my Vulture Chronicles book!"

Helga points at Alex, who is asleep on top of the wagon. "Hey, what's that rat doing on there?" She angrily shoves Alex onto the ground, and he wakes up. "Oof! Hey, thanks for nothing, Helga. I needed that sleep."

Alex says in the confessional, "You know, those two girls are really pissing me off. They're lazy as crap, and they say rude stuff to people, and nobody cares? Meanwhile, I'm just minding my own business, and everyone gives me flack about it. Jeez, double standards."

"Snapbacks an' tattoos. Snapbacks an' tattoos. Nice whips, fly chicks, all dat 'cuz cash rules," raps Devin, swaggering along annoyingly.

"Okay, dude, that's not real music," says Trick smoothly. "Real music is classic rock, man. Just listen to it, and let it suck you in. I meditate to classic rock once in a while. Pretty relaxing."

"Wha' you talkin' 'bout, G?! What be classic rock? Rocks be big ol' thangs that y' throw a' peeps! Not music! M' 'pinion, th' only true music 'round here be hardcore gangsta rap, yo," Devin yells.

Trick says in the confessional, "Is that kid serious? Like... Does he actually think he's a gangsta, or is he just playing some stupid act? Because kids can't actually be that dumb."

"Man, I just realized that we're sleeping in our tents again... That sucks, doesn't it?" Tolkien says to Trick, trying to make conversation. Trick shakes his head as they finally get to the tents.

"So, uh, who are we gonna vote out?" Chrissy says to Julia, Layla, and PJ, who are all sitting there. "I say one of the dudes, Helga, or Estrella."

"..." says PJ.

"Ew. Definitely one of the dudes. Probably Devin, he really bothers me since he's all poseur-y and whatnot," Julia says. "I heard that he said rap was the only good kind of music... What about Nutria and 1E?!"

"Nutria and 1E aren't that good, no offense, girl," Chrissy says coolly. "Real music is stuff like games., The Calves, and even Sheepyay."

"Sheepyay? You mean that pathetic one-hit wonder who wrote that boring song consisting of him whispering, and then screaming in the chorus? Yeah, that song is abhorrent. I don't listen to music, just audiobooks," Helga rants. "Even the Tanukis' cover of the song back in Tokyo was better, and I had to shut that monstrosity off halfway through."

"Whatever..." Layla scoffs. "Hey, someone want to get me some Arnold Palmer? I'm really craving it right now."

"NO!" yells PJ. Everyone stares at her.

Roz is shown with the Swagged Out Citrus Fruits at elimination. "Sooooo, Swaggy Citrus, this is your second time at elimination, huh? I really don't know what to say. Tolky, I thought you would do better. Meh, whatever. The first seashell goes toooooooooo... Chrissy." She tosses Chrissy a seashell, and Chrissy catches it.

"Alex and Trick, you two are both safe," says Roz. Alex's seashell falls into his mouth, as he is snoring.

"Mmmm, and Tolky, you too," Roz chirps. Tolkien cheers, as he catches his seashell.

"Helga and Estrella," says Roz. The two say "meh" simultaneously. "Aaaand Layla, aaaand Devin." Devin and Layla grab their seashells.

"PJ and Julia..." says Roz. "You know, I don't even... Whatevah. The final seashell goes to..."

"Julia." Julia cheers loudly.

"...Layla, you monster," PJ says quietly. "Was this because I didn't get you a drink? That is the stupidest reason to eliminate someone... EVER."

"Yep, I didn't even know," Roz says. "Peej is a fan favorite, but I guess Layla was on top of this one."

"Actually, no," Layla says, puzzled. "I voted for Julia." Julia groans. "What the crap? Is there another mystery voter, or is... What?!"

"Whatever..." PJ says. "I'll leave now." PJ walks away quietly, and boards the Boat of Losers. As she sails into the night, she glares at Layla.

Layla says in the confessional, "Of course I voted for PJ. Why would I say that out loud, though? I like playing the role of the innocent girl. And until I get a new Charles, I'm just gonna keep voting off these losers. Hmph."

"Meh," says Alex, as they walk back to their tents. "She was too overrated. Like I said back in episode one, '...' isn't that funny."

"I personally think that the Dotcubeds have a curse that makes them always be voted off 2nd..." says Tolkien. "Creepy, huh? But yeah, I'm gonna crash. Nighty-night."

"Oooooh!" Roz says happily, as they all leave. "Some drama is already heating up! Will the Hopalong Ralphcakes continue to win? Or will they crash and burn, like the Terrible Tikis? Will Layla find a new Charles, and will Chelsey and Elena continue to brawl? Will Wolfgang and Puck become friends? ...Probably not. But whatever, tune in next time on Total... Drama... Superstar Showdown!"